Academic Emancipation Statement
On September 10, 2014 I visited the UCF[1] Graduate School Fair to explore my options in pursuing a Ph.D. in Computer Science (CS). The professor told me, pretty flat out, to forget about it. Do my own research, discuss issues with other scientists and publish my own articles. Never did get his name. People like me simply do not fit into their 20-25 year old demographic. In truth he was actually more interested in delivering a dramatic performance and telling me anything, but I got the message.
After blowing off some steam I came to the same conclusion. There is nothing UCF has that I need. Peer-reviewed journals accept submissions from anyone. If gibberish articles can get published in the most prestigious academic journals, so can mine. All courses post their material on the Internet so I can study at the graduate level on my own.
My dealings with UCF CS Ph.D.s students produced three findings. Each is a greater egomaniac than the last. Each is more clueless than the last. That Graduate School is actually an Indentured Servitude system where the student works in intellectual slavery for three years.
The requirements have creeped up from reasonable to ridiculous, to ludicrous, to plaid. In the 1980's a Ph.D. student was expected to publish four articles in peer-referred journals. Today that number is 20. Given five submitted articles are needed to publish one, the student must write 100 articles during the typical three year Ph.D. career. The required GPA a graduate student must maintain has also creeped up from a reasonable 3.0, to a ludicrous 3.4 to be in "Good Standing"[2], up to the plaid and 'unmentioned' 3.6 to be "Degree Worthy". The GRE[3] has ballooned from a two hour test into a four hour marathon.
Add the traditional methods a college uses to destroy students. Zombie Classes, the instructor hasn't updated the course materials in 40 years because he doesn't feel a need to. Attrition classes, a class taught at an absurdly high difficulty level in order to fail most students. Atrocity classes, a class intended to fail every student.
One clear signal surfaces through all the noise. No University wants any student to graduate with an bachelor's or, especially, with an advanced degree. Unless the student is Einstein Level genius, lucky, or rich enough to pay for both tuition and grades. Do you seriously think that George W. Bush[4] was sober for a week during his collegiate career? Or that Donald J. Trump[5] went to classes, took an exam or submitted his own work?
Since I'm any student. I'm eliminated before getting to the starting line, again.
Academia has cheated, stolen, lied, and tried to break me for it's own sadistic ends. Academia's rules no longer apply to me. From now on I follow my rules, not theirs.
Like Winston Churchill, I must become my own University, create my own Ph.D. program in Computer Science, fulfill the requirements, and award myself the degree.
Never will I be a faculty professor or march in an academic parade. Never will I enjoy the grants or laboratories needed to conduct complex research. But never will I have to fail my students to keep my job at the University. But maybe, just maybe, when the time comes, I'll have less Bad Karma to pay off.
Left outside in the cold, alone, again.
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Parent Article: Matriculation
